All the Times In My Life I Wish I’d Said …

You know the drill. Someone says something completely obnoxious to you and anywhere from 24-hours to 10-years later, you realize how mean it was. Then — of course– you finally come up with the perfect comeback. I’m of the belief that the perfect comeback is typically: FUCK YOU! Today I list all the times in the last 48 years, starting […]

A Cursory History of My Cursing

How did I lose my swearing virginity? Well, one of the older kids in my neighborhood — she was nine to my six — taught me the word fuck on Halloween. What a word! It was an onomatopoeia before I even knew what an onomatopoeia was. Years later, I kept getting called “ugly” when I […]

God’s Will & Grace

I know the god’s will rape thing is weeks old, but I can’t get it out of my head. I mean, assessing god’s will is pretty much the business of The God, don’t you think? As in, “You dense, irritating beast of burden! I am All Powerful. You don’t get to ascertain my will!! Stick […]

Republican Archetypes

As someone who hates talking politics, but loves posting original political jokes on Facebook, I’ve bumped up against a number of different Republican types who’ve responded to my hilarity. Let’s take a look at some of the archetypes! The Really Smart Best Friend From High School Who Used to Vote Republican but Will Vote for […]